But my reason for blogging is because I realized last night I have influence. And this is not speaking from a haughty way at all! I can assure you of that. But I wrote a post on Facebook that brought a lot of attention to others. I am going to post it here in case you do not have facebook:
"It makes me sad how the world already puts so much pressure on women and girls about our looks, weight, size beauty, and much more.
But tonight as I was closing. I was chatting with a younger guy. And how beautiful his girlfriend was. He shows me a picture. She's a beautiful blonde. And I said it doesn't surprise me you're with a blonde. He said well I dated a brunette, BUT she got fat. And broke up with her. I had no words. No words. Probably a priceless look on my face.
But tonight as I was closing. I was chatting with a younger guy. And how beautiful his girlfriend was. He shows me a picture. She's a beautiful blonde. And I said it doesn't surprise me you're with a blonde. He said well I dated a brunette, BUT she got fat. And broke up with her. I had no words. No words. Probably a priceless look on my face.
This is just an example of how our looks, weight, beauty is valued by a lot of men and our world. We ALL should be heart broken about this. It makes me so sad but yet so sick that this is our world.
My thoughts are: encourage girls and women not to be consumed with this world and the views they have about body. Also men please step up and love them. Don't put an emphasis on it because it's already there!!"
Rant over.
I did not expect anyone to start commenting on it nor liking it. Simply it was after midnight and no one to talk too. But I was pretty fired up. My point is not being fired up about it and being mad. Because yes, you can call this guy ignorant and immature. But I also don't know his story, his up bringing, his struggles. Which is not an out for him but a little grace for him.
But the comment made me sick to my stomach. I know many women and girls who struggle with deep rooted issues within weight, body image, and insecurities. These type of comments drive eating disorders, depression, anxiety, and self harm. And I've seen it personally. I've faced it daily. And the world doesn't realize what they are conveying to us daily. It gives boys and men this false view of how we should be and look. They even go to the extreme to make it worse and for these expectations to continue in our relationships. This is not okay!
So what's the solution??
Lets be real. I DON'T KNOW. But one thing I know is that we can change one life at a time. We can support others in their battle. Real men should help other men and boys who have this preconceived view of how they treat women and how we should look. Because women how many of us have a curvy body, boobs, big butt, thick legs, more skin on our arms than we'd like to see, more hippy than we want to admit, love handles, double chins? Lord, the list could go on. We are not a barbie!!! Even though secretly we all wish we were.
Women, girls, sisters, friends, family lets not allow this world to consume us. YES, I'm sad, sickened, angry at how men and this world want us to be "perfect" but that's not who we have to be. I'm in this battle with you. We can win this. I don't have the answers but I know there is hope. HOPE is what I hold onto daily. So as a friend told me today "keep on keepin on" and I read that today and was like that's ALL we can do each day. We may fail daily and fall into the worlds view of how we should look, weigh, and beauty. I do daily but it doesn't have to define who I am.
So I leave you with this women:
Keep on keepin on
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